Difficult Decisions Best Intentions

When I started this blog page it was with the intention of doing it every day. Boy what a dream that was. Several times I have started only to be interrupted or decided I would write another day. Of course the other day never came. Sometimes the same thing happens in my prayer life. My intentions are of the best, but something comes up or I am interrupted. The same can be said for every area in my life, my health, family life, work life and even my rest time. Hebrews 12:11 says, "No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." Boy is there truth in that verse. A truth that applies to all areas of my life. I am a diabetic that wears an insulin pump. I know what I can and cannot or should not eat, but does that stop me, NO. I use the excuse that I am stressed and I need it. What a lame excuse!! Sometimes I get so busy I forget to eat on time and then I just grab something that is not good for me. The samething seems to happen in all areas of my life, unless I discipline and train myself, which is often diffiuclt. Of course most of the diffiuclty comes from my trying to do it by me, myself and I. That I always gets in the way, because I leave out my precious Lord when the I controls my life. So it is once again time to go back to the training board with a renewed committment to discipline and training. Wow, what a relief, I am not alone, I do not have to do it by myself..... Thank you Lord!

O let my life resemble

more of you each day

Mold me with your Spirit

like the potter molds the clay.

My Children, my love

Both my daughter Lori and my son Matt are the joy and love of my life. They have both grown into lovely adults of whom I am proud to know and call my children. Both of my kids had struggles as infants. Lori was two months early and Matt was 5 weeks early. Lori is a Type I diabetic and wears an insulin pump. She has been a diabetic since she was 12. I cannot tell you how many nights my husband and I were afraid we would lose her due to insulin reactions. Many times we had to call the paramedics for her. Her pregnancy with our oldest grandson was very stressful on her body. Several times both my husband and I were in tears as we saw her struggle to make sure the baby she was carrying was getting everything it needed. She has become an amazing loving and caring woman who is very bright.

Our son had his struggles at the age of two months when he was hospitalized twice for a premature digestive system. Growing up he always seemed to fly through life. As a toddler he was into everything. As an adult I am amazed at the man he has become. He is an incredible father and husband.

As a mom I am embarrassed to say I did not always do these two beautiful children justice. One of my favorite writers Marjorie Holmes, in her book, "I've Got to Talk to Somebody God," wrote a prayer "I was so cross to the Children." In that prayer she talked about being so cross with her children, so discouraged, so tired and unreasonable and then took it out on them. As a mother, I like her cringe and my heart aches when I remember my bad temper, my impatience and my yelling. Many times I would go and sit beside there bed after they were asleep with tears remembering the confusion and fear in their little eyes. They were helpless at the adult power and control over them. Yet today all these years later, they love me anyway and they have forgiven me. Just as Christ loves me and forgives me.

Lord, I thank you for these beautiful creatures you have brought into my life. I thank you for both of them and for their abilities and uniqueness, for their loving and kind spirits. But most of all Lord I thank you for allowing me to be their mother. Protect my children, Lord. Provide for them, keep them safe, Lord. Protect my son in heart and my daughter in heart. Lord I thank you for them and for the love they give my children. Lord, Let my children always know they are loved and cherished by me.

Thank you dear Lord for all You have given me!

Wow, another beautiful day in Your kingdom. Another day to send thanks and praise Your way. You have blessed me in so many ways, with my two youngest grandchildren, my oldest grandson, my daughter and son, my son and daughter in heart, husband, sisters and of course my mom. I look at my mom and the 80 years you have given her, 30 more that my dad had. I look at my son and I see my dad in him and I see his dad in him. I thank you Lord that you are the Lover of his soul. What a blessing he, his wife and the children are.

I thank You for all you have given me. You have truly blessed my family and I do not recognize that often enough. Thank you especially for my husband, who is my earthly strenght. I am so glad you fashioned him for me. I am thankful you have shown us how to delight in each other. Thank you for our home, family and friends. Thank you for bringing us up in a free country with plenty of everything...Thank you Lord for saving my soul, thank you Lord for making me whole. Thank you for the sun (and especially your son), the moon, stars, rain, snow and all the seasons and all the beauty of this earth. Thank you for the psalms..........What is man that You are mindful of him, the son of man that You care for him? Psalm 8: 4

What a beautiful day!

Today was a beautiful sunny day. I am always surprised that I see beauty even in areas that others see garbage and junk. I can go to an inner core area as I did today and see the beauty that once was and in some ways still remains. Oh Lord, thank you for that ability that you have given me. Thank you that even in the uglyiest areas in life I can still see your beauty and grace. I praise God and reflect on His righteousness, forgiveness and mercy today. I praise God for who He is and for His goodness. I will pray with Purpose, Reverance, in Awe of God's Integrity and Sovereignty, Eternally. Please enjoy the picture of two of my grandsons. They are cousins that are best buds when they are together. Thank you Lord for these precious children that allow me to see your world through their eyes.

This is my first time blogging. I decided to use this picture of the love of my life, my husband. The Lord has so blessed me in my life. So many times I am amazed at what He does and how He takes care of me. He has blessed me with wonderful friends and family. The Lord has provided me with a loving and caring husband, a daughter who has grown into a beautiful and awesome woman, wife and mother and who is married to a great husband who takes wonderful care of her. A son who has grown into a wonderful man and an amazing father and who is married to a beautiful godly woman who is an incredible mother. We have been blessed with three beautiful grandsons.

Lord, I just want to thank you today and every day for all you have provided for us and for the peace I have knowing you are always there. I love you Lord.